Put Your Hands in the Moment
Children Are Never Too Old for Love's Touch
Throat
and ear infections had served up my child over a week of pain. A ruptured
eardrum made it almost unbearable. She braved the infections with painkillers and
antibiotics while I was 1400 miles north of her. A few days after I arrived
home, I sat on the sofa next to her. She put her head in my lap, and I gently
moved my hand on her head, smoothing her hair while my other hand touched her
arm.
That
moment, my hands in the moment, opened my eyes once again to what
matters—family, closeness, touch. That moment, my hands in the moment, also
again opened my eyes and heart to the realization that our children are always
our children. The same child who placed her head on my lap I loved nuzzling when she was a baby, her milky kitten scent awakening my own senses and filling me with
delight. That child is now twenty-five years old and her milky kitten scent is
long gone. What isn’t long gone is the instinctual need for parent and child to
connect.
When
our children are infants, toddlers, and preteens, we touch, soothe, and hug
them so often that we cannot count the ways. As they get older, recognizing
their individuality and desire to wean themselves from our constant care, in
our culture, we often minimize or even stop regular touch. We may stop, but the
need doesn’t stop. The desire to connect with our children, no matter what
their age, doesn’t stop. The comfort of touch and the love it expresses don’t
stop.
As
I, too, have reached a certain age, I often touch, soothe, and hug my young
grandchildren. My child’s head on my lap and my hands in the moment remind me
that my adult children—and I—also benefit from hands in the moment.
